10 of the best, funniest and craziest Metal Gear Rising Quotes

Exactly three years ago today, on February 19th 2013, Metal Gear Rising Revengeance was released in North America. The action filled spin off featuring cyborg Raiden is not really considered a canonical part of the Metal Gear timeline, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t have any entertaining quotes. Here are the ten most memorable, craziest and funniest pieces of dialogue from the game.

Empty-Space

I said my sword is a tool of justice, not used in anger, not drawn in vengeance. But now, I’m not so sure. And besides, this isn’t my sword.

Raiden

Metal-Gear-Rising-Raiden-This-isnt-my-sword

Okay, so after being able to quell the bloodthirsty demon hiding inside Raiden’s psyche, he embraces his purpose as a protector of justice, not as a spirit of vengeance. But some people just beg you to make an exception. Senator Armstrong is one of those people. He is a very good reason to draw your sword as a tool of vengeance. And if that wasn’t enough, there’s another little fact Raiden considers: this sword isn’t even his. How convenient!

Empty-Space

All we’re saying is… Give war a chance!

Sundowner

Metal-Gear-Rising-Sundowner-Give-War-a-Chance

That’s not unreasonable, right? Come on, give war a chance, it might surprise you. No, but seriously, this guy isn’t even trying to justify war as a means to an end. No, he goes above and beyond and calls to question the negative imago of war itself. Because hey, don’t judge a book by its cover… or, don’t judge warfare by its use of brainwashing children, who can be molded into committing all sorts of atrocities, “and there’s nothing like a good atrocity to keep a war going’. Yeah, if this guy isn’t an evil maniac, then no one is.

Empty-Space

Maybe I was wrong about you. You’re not greedy… you’re batshit INSANE!

Raiden

Metal-Gear-Rising-Raiden-Batshit-Insane

There’s a lot of things you can accuse senator Armstrong of, but indecisiveness isn’t one of them. During his fight with Raiden he lays out his plans for a new America – while beating Raiden up at the same time. After listening to the senator’s passionate speech during which every point he makes is underlined by the sole of his shoe ramming down on Raiden’s chest, Raiden has to adjust his views about the politician. He did change his mind about Armstrong, but not quite in the direction the senator was aiming at. Raiden is now sure of it: it’s not greed that drives this man. It’s simply a total lack of common sense.

Empty-Space

Nanomachines, son!

Armstrong

Metal-Gear-Rising-Armstrong-Nanomachines-Son

Senator Armstrong is a man of many surprises. Like when his skin suddenly turns into an armor. His explanation? Nanomachines, son!

Empty-Space

Don’t fuck with THIS senator!

Armstrong

Metal-Gear-Rising-Senator-Steven-Armstrong

Can he be any more clear with this? You may be able to mess with some politicians, but not this one. Because this senator is a crazy, nano-machine enhanced, football playing, super weapon powering, foul mouthed member of the senate. Who could, in his own words, break the president in two with his bare hands. And probably not just as a manner of speaking. Now the only question is: who elected this guy?

Empty-Space

Pain… this is why I live. This is my normal. This is my nature.

Raiden

Metal-Gear-Rising-Raiden-This-is-my-nature

Raiden’s inner demon – Jack the Ripper, a remnant from his past as a child soldier – is awakened during the course of the game. It turns him into a bloodthirsty monster, an alter ego for which pain and killing comes natural. It’s also kind of creepy.

Empty-Space

First, you need to take a DOOMP.

Doktor

Metal-Gear-Rising-DOOMP

How would you react if a doctor with a heavy German accent told you this? “Wait… what?” Raiden asks. A digital-optical output mounted proxy, of course! As you might have guessed, this joke is only in the English version of the game, in the Japanese version there’s a different misunderstanding altogether, about Raiden’s jumping abilities. In this case the localized version may be the most fun one.

Empty-Space

Mind if I cut in?

Sam

Metal-Gear-Rising-Sam-Mind-if-I-cut-in

Get it, ‘cut’, because he’s a swordsman? Ah, a play on words, who doesn’t like them?

Empty-Space

Wordplay: My exoskeleton resembles a canine: canines enjoy bones. Amusing on two levels.

Blade Wolf (K-9000)

Metal-Gear-Rising-K-9000

You know what’s even better than spontaneously coming up with a clever wordplay? Having an robotic wolf possessing an artificial intellect ‘far beyond human reckoning’ acknowledge its funniness from the backseat of your car. After Raiden convinces his team to ‘throw him a bone’, the LQ-84i responds by quickly analyzing the joke and drawing the scientifically grounded conclusion that it’s amusing.

Empty-Space

Wind blows, rain falls, and the strong prey upon the weak.

Monsoon

Metal-Gear-Rising-Monsoon-Wind-blows

Monsoon is a guy who doesn’t seem to believe in anything. “Free will is a myth. Religion is a joke.” He doesn’t believe in anything, except for ‘the memes’. You can’t fight nature, he tells Raiden. You can’t fight the wind, the rain, or the slaughter taking place in the world. What Raiden can do, however, is throw a helicopter in Monsoon’s face.

  • Big Bosch

    I really loved that first one about Sam’s sword.

  • Mr.Pony

    Blade wolf was so awkwardly hilarious, now i just want to put on my sombrero and go slash stuff

    • Mr.Pony

      Best review of MGR I’ve seen on steam “If Devil May Cry and Ninja Gaiden had a baby that did cocaine while playing an electric guitar on the roof of a yacht going through a typhoon, this game would personify that.”

      • That does make you want to play it.

      • SaladinSilver

        That almost makes me play it. Almost…..

  • Somewhat related

  • YuriFan

    The Memes, Jack.

  • Xomak

    lol, this one is my favorite: “I’m fucking invincible!” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mFpks7EvkQY

    • Elvis_Tek

      Yeah

    • Elvis_Tek

      xD

  • Playstation HQ

    Point THeme right? the fastest!!!! 🙂 kind of didn´t get the pun, but anyway, love it!!!

  • Jav
    • Lewis

      I heard this rumor, and never understood it’s origins. He doesn’t look like Vamp, he doesn’t fight like Vamp and his voice and manner are not even close. Dunno.

  • BurntFM

    I’m glad Raiden managed to avoid drowning in MGS2. Otherwise we wouldn’t have this comedic gold. LOL

  • Jav

    I have a question about the pc version of tpp. Is this version using dynamic contrast? Because I think it is. The picture has nothing to do with my question, well, maybe it has. I have to use the brightness in 6 because it’s too dark.
    (I just bought the pc version because the illegal one was shit and I don’t want to play the story again in ps4).

  • Gatsu

    Don’t fuck with this senator xD… That fight is so awesome.

    I love this game :3.

  • This game was very underrated mainly because of his troubled genesis (I still remember Hideo’s sadness in the “making of” video regarding the switch from MGSR to MGRR… god bless Minami’s friendship with Kojima) but, surprisingly for most, it came out as a really fun one to play: the soundtrack boost the entire gameplay perfectly from the beginning to the end, the boss fights were badass with a well-calibrated difficult for my skills (defeating the Senator the first time was one of the most satisfying victories as a gamer also despite/thanks to my old TV LCD Samsung LE37M86BD high imput-lag with my Dualshock 3 extremely pushed to his limits and beyond… poor analog sticks), the “Rules of Nature moment” was the truly wtf “welcome dear skeptical Metal Gear fan looking for some adrenalinic blade battles” I needed to properly adjust my inner “Metal Gear Tune” to enjoy into this Zan-Datsu orgy as if I was coming back to my to my glory arcade days; the overall “don’t take too seriously atmosphere” of the game was really enjoyable for a veteran Kojima’s fan like me and even some trophies were hilarious to earn like the one for listening most of the codec conversation!!! PURE GOLD LITERALLY (should it be added in any Metal Gear chapter via patch as a punishment to all the “I don’t give a fuck about the MGS story” players) and I still miss 5 trophies from the two story dlc’s to achieve 100% (I’ve already earned the Platinum one) but my “Phantom Pain” obsession with MGSV it’s still too high at the moment so I’ll take care of it one day in the future, I hope so… meanwhile about the story all I have to say is described in this ancient meme which I consider my internet debut in this specific “field” of creating funny pics to express complex arguments in a quickly way XD

    • Lovesick

      Whatever happened to the concept of being able to run on walls during combat? Eh, I guess they scrapped it in general.

  • Plissken

    MGSV=”Parasites, son!”

  • mariokarthero

    These kinds of quotes is why MGR will remain one of my top 5 favourite Metal Gear games.

  • Lewis

    Eeeehm…where’s “Rules of Nature”?)
    Though not a quote, it’s timing is perfectly fine to make it one. A dude throws a giant Metal Gear with his hand and runs on buildings and the song just says…It’s okay. It’s what nature wants.

  • Alex

    “Free will is a myth. Religion is a joke.”

    Well from certain perspectives, these things are true and not far fetched or “bat shit insane” you know. I know its sensitive subject matter but just think about it from certain perspectives, you don’t have to agree with the generalization of the statements. For free will, you are limited to the environment you are born into, how you’re raised, etc. and nobody can just do whatever they want at any given point in their lives. You have freedoms but in the grand scheme of things, it only stretches so far and for some it doesn’t really stretch far if at all. Like, a child born into cancer is pretty screwed regardless, as just an example. We don’t know much about Monsoon but he easily could’ve been the Sniper Wolf type, born and raised in conflict. Regardless it is easy to understand why a cynical person would come to that conclusion/philosophy and is not far fetched at all. It doesn’t take insanity to believe that free will is a myth.

    With religion as a joke, some religions have been used and some even created as a means of control over people’s behaviors/actions, or as a means of justifying war (The Crusades). Points of history have evidence to this, but it doesn’t necessarily mean all religion has ulterior motives or are fabricated stories/jokes; some believe so but that is obviously up for you to decide. I’m just pointing out how any atheist would easily be able to agree with that sentiment, and there’s plenty of atheists among adults.

    The confrontation with Monsoon, both in its storytelling and gameplay, was easily the high peak of the game for me. You have these fighting philosophies in which Raiden isn’t even really sure and starts losing himself. The build-up just before with slow walking and psyche, Jack the Ripper exploding onto the scene, the boss battle itself being super intense both for your hands and the audio/visual orgasm going on; its just so much going on at once, tons of thought provoking moments followed up by insanity leaving you not much room to ponder. One thing’s for sure, Raiden in that moment with Monsoon wasn’t cognoscenti enough to deliver good, 100% true counter arguments to prove him completely in the wrong. He was confused more than anything and he pushed forward in the only way he knew how, rewinding his mind back to a time when “thought” wasn’t part of the equation. Solid Snake, Big Boss, and even some Assassins in the AC series have had moments where they know the situation isn’t clear cut, they feel a bit in the wrong even if they may or may not be more in the right, and have to kill with that heavy burden in them forever. Raiden in this particular moment seemed like he had to go completely mental or he would not have overcame Monsoon. Monsoon is the only point in which Jack the Ripper was a complete necessity for success. And Raiden was being psychologically broken down by Sam and Monsoon, defeated more by words and guilt than actual action. The whole moment in general felt like philosophical exploration, while the Senator felt like a fun parody of that kind of exploration MGS is known for.

    • Yeah there was a lot of humor in MG Rising giving it a lighter tone than the average Metal Gear (and it has a much higher pace). All the bosses seem mostly crazy in their own way of thinking. But the part with the senator is where the game really went full Devil May Cry. 😛 It’s fun though.

      • Lovesick

        To be fair though, the Senator was attempting to get on Raiden’s good side in order to convert him to his side, which is why he was so comedic. You are able to tell this because when Raiden screams “You’re batshit insane!” Senator Armstrong has this look of shock. You actually start to feel bad…..for the bad guys. If you think about it, Armstrong was only trying to kickstart the world into a new era of change. Sure, his methods of getting there were brutal, but he had a decent enough goal.

        You know when you’re feeling FOR the bad guys that a storyline and game are very well made.

    • Lovesick

      The subliminal messages of Rising really do have relevance. Kojima even predicted Trump to win the American election lmao. That might be a stretch, but you know what I mean.

      The entirety of Rising was a reference to modern day society, especially in its songs. Give Collective Consciousness a listen and you’ll quickly realise it’s a song all about oppression and rebellion. In “It has to be this Way” the line “Violence breeds Violence” (I think it is) is pretty much saying two wrongs achieve nothing. God, I feel like I’m back in high school english class.

      Yeah, Rising definitely isn’t your typical braindead hack ‘n’ slash game. It actually had a story and imo it’s pretty much the Deadpool of the Metal Gear series; in the way it speaks back to the player.

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